June 2012
50 posts
(I work in a Coffee Shop. I was on break in the lobby when a couple walks in. Directly behind them is a cute little boy in Batman costume.)
Me: “Oh my God! It’s BATMAN!”
(The boy stops, strikes a pose and starts looking around menacingly. After a few seconds, he approaches the counter.)
Mother: “Jeff, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.”
Mother: “The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “Yes. Yes, The Batman would.”
(The couple pays while the boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)
Boy: *sips* “Gotham is safe.”
It's Cold On Mars
John Green: What do I know about the p--
Hank Green: It's cold.
John: Is it cold on Mars?
Hank: It's cold on Mars.
John: Really?
Hank: It's cold on Mars
John: Really?
Hank: It's cold on Mars
John: Are you positive?
Hank: ...
John: The whole time? All year round? Even in the summer?
Hank: ... It's cold on Mars. Sorry
John: Even in August?
Hank: It's cold
John: Right at the equator?
Hank: It's cold
John: Right at the Martian equator?
Hank: It's cold
John: 'Cause it's further from Earth; is that why?
Hank: Yes- It's further from the sun. It has nothing to do with how far it is from Earth.
John: Wait, you're telling me that heat is not produced by the Earth? Now, everything is being overturned! Next, you'll tell me that the Earth is not the center of the Universe or that 6^5 is not 4!
Hank: You're bad at being a nerd...
